Myth #1) Modeling one's house in the likeness of the Parthenon- Now, I will admit that I have never seen anything as extreme as the home in the movie, but there are lots of "columns" supply stores (and not just downtown in the "touristy" section-- all over!) that also sell HUGE statues of ancient Greek gods and goddesses. And ya gotta assume that these stores wouldn't exist if there wasn't a market for these things, right? So, I have to infer that somewhere there are abodes decorated with straight up Ionic columns and a marble bust of Zeus... or seven.
Myth #2) Windex will cure all ailments- Several Greek people I met swear that this actually works, but I never saw anyone actually try it. What I believe the movie writers were spoofing on is that every single yiayia has her own personal home remedy for anything and everything and will insist that hers is the only way and the right way to fix the problem. The time comes to mind that a few of us were waiting for a ferry in Piraeus, and a friend was suffering from a spontaneous and mysterious eye ailment. The yiayia who ran the restaurant we were in did not even ask if her medical care was desired but immediately sprang into action and concocted something in the back and immediately plopped it onto my friend's face all the while swearing up and down that she would cure her. Honestly, her eye did look better after that.
Myth #3) "Whadda you mean he don't eat no meat?! That's ok; I make lamb."- This is just true. That's really all there is. The word for "vegetarian" in Greek directly translates to "lover of vegetables," and is always met with a great belly laugh from a waiter and then the force feeding of a meatball.
Myth #4) Every word... is a Greek word- In the film, etymology was Toula's father's favorite game. He loved showing people how every word can be traced back to its Greek origin in just a few simple steps. This is not only very true but so is the pastime. With good reason, the Greeks are very proud of their language and will regale you with the history and meaning behind a word at any chance they get. In fact, this made teaching English very interesting, indeed. You see, the "big words," the "SAT words," if you will, that we struggle to learn here in the States are generally-- you guessed it-- Greek words; it is the smaller, more common words that are usually hybrids of other languages or made up by the Anglo Saxons. My students, then, had no problem with words that I deemed advanced for seventh grade. I can't count the number of times I would catch myself saying something like, "This is pretty idiosyncratic of Poe... oh wait, do you guys know what that means?" only to be greeted in reply with peels of laughter and a, "Yes, Miss, of course! It's a Greek word."
Myth #5) Everyone is named Nick- This is also true. It is my very scientific calculation that there are approximately 5.5 Greek names in existence. Nick being one of them.
Myth #6) Bundt cake- This joke in the movie is not supported by my experience. Maybe there is a different word in Greek, but the cake itself would not confound anyone as much as it did in the movie. The mother in the movie has her mind absolutely BLOWN by the cake-with-the-hole-in-it, but this would never happen. First of all, I saw bundt cakes in many a bakery in Greece, so they definitely exist there. Also, these people in the movie were Greek-American and owned a diner. No way could they have avoided bundt cakes all those years.
Myth #7) Fear of technology- Yes. Just yes. There were no computers in the hospital I saw, there was only ONE computer for ALL of the teachers to share at our school, there was no WiFi, there was no fax machine or scanner or "craft making" machines at the school, either. The logical response is, maybe there just wasn't enough funding. Suffice it to say, this is not-- NOT-- the case. Perhaps this would be a fine explanation if we were on a remote island or in a less affluent part of town, but specific to the conditions I was faced with, I have no explanation other than the if it ain't broke, don't fix it mentality, which is rampant.
Myth #8) Yiayia- One of the more hilarious parts of the movie is the representation of the Greek family's yiayia, or grandmother. She is clad head to toe in black and is constantly muttering in Greek about hating the Turks. This is funny... because it is true.
Myth #9) Roasting an animal on the front lawn + ungodly abundance of food- Oh, this is just so spot on it's wonderful. Having a personal family animal-roaster is just part of the standard kitchen supplies. See something roasting outside, you know it's either Easter or a special occasion like a wedding or baptism. Or a Tuesday. Additionally, the abundance of food present at a feast or even just a dinner party truly is remarkable. The thought behind this is the same as in other Mediterranean cultures: the worst thing that could EVER happen would be for a guest to go hungry; the second worst thing that could ever happen would be for an unexpected guest to drop by only to find that there was nothing left to eat.
Myth #10) Tricking people into saying stupid things/bad/offensive words because who the hell speaks Greek- Oh, yes. Another pastime of the Greek people. One of the "warnings" they gave us when we started teaching was to NEVER parrot anything suggested by a student or ask them for a translation. If you wanted to know what a word meant, you asked another teacher or looked it up yourself. The kids would instantly ask you if you spoke Greek the second you walked into the room, and my response was always, "Yes, so don't try to trick me or say mean things to each other. I'll know." They got me a few times, though, regardless. Always gotta be on your A-game. In fact, one of my first introductions to the Greek language came from being tricked by my favorite Greek diner waiter back in NYC into yelling terribly offensive things loudly throughout the restaurant. Learned my lesson quickly after that not to mention learned Greek.
That will do for now. I could go all day. Grab a glass of ouzo and go watch the movie. I hope that after having read this it will even more rigorously tickle your funny bone.
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